And Now, From The Northern European Heavy Metal Forefront

I can't decide if I think these are two of the best metal songs/videos ever, or two of the worst metal songs/videos either. Either way, they just might rock your damn face off, so watch out.


A surrealist masterpiece if ever there was one.


It is of the utmost importance that you pay special attention to the lyrics in this folk/metal hybrid.

Odd...

...I always thought it was two women singing this.

I may just go and get my hair cut like that guy's is over my lunch break.

Eat Lead

It's been a while - twenty years, give or take a year or two - since I've seen a video game that I wanted to get as soon as it was available. But, wow, can I have two, please?

Rock & Roll Party

To commemorate my turning 30 (last week on the 11th - apparently, the Ayatollahs first came to power in Iran on the day I was born. Huh.), myself and some of the other hacks (not all them are hacks like me, though) that I know are meeting up tomorrow at Captain Cook's in Saranac Lake from 4 to 8 pm to knock the foam off of a couple of pints and play some rock music. If you're reading this and you're in the area (or feel like traveling, in which case, get your ass to an airport right now), you should stop in.

This is what I hope things will sound like:


And this is what things probably really will sound like:

Only not as tight.

Hollywood Has Some Major Catching Up To Do

It all looks so real:

Randomness...With Lots Of Links

Here's a bunch of shit I've seen recently on the interwebs. I'm doing a lot of watching cells fall into tubes™ today - and all week, if you can't tell.



I'm so glad that horror movies are finally getting back to silly lots-of-blood-but-nothing-too-realistic-with-lots-of-laughs-and-irony-aplenty fare than the poop that's been churned out for the last several years. Here's an example of something new that's coming out (the f-word gets used a few times, so turn your speakers down at work).



I can totally see that playing on late night TV sometime in the future, with some dude dressed up like Baron Samadi hanging out in a crypt popping up before and after commercial breaks.

Reading this made me feel pain. Damn.

I'll take two, please.

What's that last trap supposed to do, exactly? Or is that why they're called "Booby" traps? Bad pun, bad!

I would watch this movie.

I only recognize about half of the characters seen here. Anyone want to enlighten me?

You know, I like Star Wars too, but really? How could this be necessary? How many of these people do you think are fully functioning members of society (and by fully functioning I mean "not likely to creep you out when you have to sit next to them during your lunch hour")? I'm amused that at least half of the women in the "Legion" have expressions on their face that seem to say "I can't believe I let my boyfriend dress me up in this shit."

By far one of the best ideas ever, and from Sir Elton, no less. I bet that book that's one of Jane Austen's (maybe the same one) only with added zombie carnage is pretty good to.

Yup. Half of this looks delicious, half of it looks completely vomit inducing.

That's all. If anyone still checks this out, that should keep you busy for a while. I've got some pictures to put up after lunch (I've got a looooong sort booked today, so I'll be at the computer until my eyes bleed).

Oh Man...

...Am I glad that Conan O'Brian's going to be in an earlier time slot soon. I'll still probably fall asleep before his show airs, but at least there's a chance that I'll catch brilliant stuff like this:

Music That You Don't Listen To (But Probably Should)

Mahavishnu Orchestra. Led by John Mclaughlin (who was in Miles Davis' band for a while, so you know he's solid) was an international group of jazz cats turned rockers - what those in the know call "fusion." Some people complain about the over-the-top musicianship on display here, and at times it does get a bit too technical to be all that enjoyable, but most of the time they throw in enough hooks to keep it catchy while they show off their chops. Here's a video of the whole band:

"One Word"
I'm so glad that we have YouTube now to fill in where date of birth (by the way, for anyone who cares, I turned 30 today! Boo!) has prevented me from seeing some great musicians performing in their heydays.

Here's a video of John Mclaughlin (with Al Di Meola and Paco DeLucia aka The Guitar Trio, who are also awesome in there own right. If I do this again maybe I'll find a video of something from Friday Night In San Francisco to prattle on about) playing a Mahavishnu Orchestra piece (and also one of my favorite songs, this son of a bitch plays in my head a good portion of the time, along with another Mahavishnu tune "Birds Of Fire, which I can't find a decent video of):

"Meeting of the Spirits"

Here's the same thing, electrified:

Grumpy Connor

Me: Come on Connor, smile for the camera!
Connor: Reh!
Me: But if you put the bag together, the other kids will put Valentine's candies into it later.
Connor: Rowr!
Little Girl Across The Table From Connor: Don't worry, he's always like this when he's at this school.
Me: Oh.

Current Or Not Current?

Either way, I want to go to there.

Cindy, you're getting a VCR, a gun, and a gold chain of Friday. Hope ya like it!

2nd or 3rd Greatest Thing Ever

This is no Japanese Hitler, but I think it's pretty great nonetheless. Mostly because, if given the proper tools, it's exactly the kind of thing that one of my kids would create. Hell, if given the proper tools, it's the kind of thing that I would create.

Poor Vader!

The story is that this kid Dark Lord just got done with having some teeth pulled and the drugs haven't worn off yet. I remember similar things from when I had my wisdom teeth out a few years back. If nothing else, it at least it goes to show that I'm not the only one who makes ass-holey videos of their kids Sith Lords.

Yup.

This pretty much sums up exactly how I felt about Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull (although I actually didn't mind the nucular assplosion part so much, it was that ALIENS! part of the plot that didn't sit well with me).



I dunno. It had some of the familiar Indiana Jones tropes in there, and I guess it was entertaining enough. But the whole thing just seemed kind of soulless. Like decaffeinated coffee. Or non-alcoholic beer. Or Madonna.

Poor Kid

The story is that this kid just got done with having some teeth pulled and the drugs haven't worn off yet. I remember similar things from when I had my wisdom teeth out a few years back. If nothing else, it at least it goes to show that I'm not the only one who makes ass-holey videos of their kids.